Happy New Year,
If I had been working on Christmas instead of New Year's Day, this would have been my submission then, but I'm here today, so here goes.
It comes from a Mrs. Esther David, who says she needs "a honest and God fearing person who have the feelings of human" to help her use some of the $3.5 million her late husband left her to do the bidding of the Lord. She's dying too, in case you were wondering.
Interestingly, I searched Mrs. David on a search engine and found the exact same email from 2011 except then, she was from France, not Cote d'Ivoire, and her late husband's name was Nicolas, not Daniel.
We said it a bunch in 2013, but not yet in 2014, so here goes: You're not going to have a total stranger from halfway across the world offer you a ton of money to do the work of the Lord. Just isn't going to happen. As my colleague Susan Siman likes to say, "There's no free money."
By the way, this email, purportedly from Cote d'Ivoire, adds to our already impressive list of locations from where we've received solicitations. Just in the last couple of weeks, we've heard from Syria, Malaysia, the Republic of Benin, Slovakia, South Africa, Burkina Faso and let's not forget, Zimbabwe and Swaziland. It's as if I'm a modern-day Walter Mitty with all the places I get to visit in my imagination.
Why don't we get these from Australia, New Zealand, or even, Gary, Indiana for that matter?
Anyhow, if you get one of these you want to share, feel free to send it to me: email@example.com and then, just hit delete.
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Fri, Dec 27, 2013 at 2:59 PM
Subject: Dearest In the Lord Jesus Christ
Dearest In the Lord Jesus Christ
Greetings, I am Mrs. Esther David an aging widow suffering from long time illness. I am currently admitted in a private hospital here in Abidjan Cote d'ivoire, I have some funds I inherited from my late loving husband Mr. Daniel David. The amount of US$3.500, 000.00 which he deposited in one of the Bank Here and I need a honest and God fearing person who have the feelings of human that can use this funds for God's work and 15% out of the total funds will be for your compensation for doing this work of God. Please if you would be able to use these funds for the Lord's work kindly reply to me in this address (firstname.lastname@example.org) for more details.
May the Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ the love of God and the sweet fellowship of the Lord be with you and your family's Amen?
Your Sister In The Lord.
Mrs. Esther David